Another Fine Mess I’ve Gotten Myself Into…

— by ADVNTR123 —

I was in a bit of a dry spell in my dating life, and having always loved the feeling of helplessness of bondage (but with no one to help) I started experimenting with different ways to immobilize myself. This really gave me a thrill, not only for all of the prep time that would go into it, but also there is an added rush when you think that this time, you *just… might … not…* get free… and you did it to yourself!

On this particular day I wanted to try to accomplish the entire feat using nothing that was not commonly available in a normal household. This added to the feeling that it could happen at any given time, anywhere… I knew my friend, Mellisa, had to work from 12-6, and so at 12:05, just before I began my adventure, I called her workplace and left a message for her to swing by after work. This way she could use her key to the apartment and rescue me if my timing was off and I got myself stuck. She and I had talked often about various bondage fantasies, and I knew she got into it with *her* girlfriend and had a very mischievous mind… the perfect deterrent, as I *knew* I wouldn’t want to end up in her clutches. I had dreamed of it, but as her tastes were not for my sex, we had just remained great friends (although she always said that given the right circumstances, … who could know??!) Hanging up the phone, I unpacked the supplies:

In the kitchen, on the floor beside the stove I placed a small knife on a plate. I would have to work my way out of the bedroom, down the hall, through the living room and into the kitchen to cut my way free. However, since I was planning to hog-tie myself, this would be very difficult and time consuming. I went into the bedroom and opened a fresh cotton rope. I unrolled it and cut it into pieces of various lengths (so that untieing one series of knots would only release one part). Then I laid them out on the floor of my bedroom. I then laid out my old sleeping bag, for cushioning, and got out the box of Christmas tree disposal bags left over from last December (these are large oversized trash bags). I placed the bag around the open sleeping bag, and viola! A comfy spot that would also keep the carpet clean (since apartment deposits and cleaning are so expensive!) Finally, I got out the elastic blindfold I had made, complete with padded sections around the eyes, which completely eliminates cheating. Finally, I got out the 32 oz. bottle of Elmers Glue I had purchased from the warehouse club store across the street.

Finally, it was time to begin. I stripped down to a pair of old boxer shorts, crossed my legs, and beginning at my big toes, used one rope at a time to bind my legs together. I made sure that they were tight and could only be untied by reaching my knees, which since I was to be hog-tied, meant that my legs could only be freed once my hands were free. First the toes were bound (also adding an erotic feel) then the ankles, then below the knees, then above the knees. Then I finally tied my ankles to the ropes around my thighs, pulling the strap tight and locking my legs tightly and solidly into position. Now my legs were completely immobilized, and I thought about quitting right there while I could still undo the knots, but with excited, shaking hands I continued.

I had prepared an elaborate version of the handcuff knot, which is similar to a hangmans noose, with two loops. The rope slides only one direction… once tightened, it *won’t* come loose! The free ends of this were where the challenge of escape was: I would tie them with a string of knots to my knees and to the bed post with the knots being *just* barely within fingertip reach once complete. From practice, I knew I was able to safely untie 18 tightly made knots in 20 minutes. I also knew from several experiments that ropes soaked in Elmers Glue harden to the point to where knots in ropes can’t be untied after 20 minutes… here was the challenge! After tying 15 knots (I left some to spare, the reason will soon be described) I opened the jug of Elmers and poured it thickly onto the ropes and knots, rubbing it in. I also covered the handcuff knot, so that once on there would be no way out but to squirm my way to the knife and cut my way out. But if I didn’t get the knots untied before the glue dried, I would be stranded there, unable to reach the knife unless I could pull my bed down the hall (not!). The glue had the added effect of coating me in a slippery (until dry!) coating that added to the experience. After also spilling a good quantity onto the other ropes and my body, I knew that even once free, I d have to wait for the glue to firm up or else risk ruining my carpet… and I had the constant knowledge that the knots would be ever so slowly but surely drying… thus creating the perfect bondage time-trap!

I slipped on the blindfold and it’s well crafted shape pressed quickly into place: it was not coming off without hands specifically removing it! Feeling the glue starting to dry, I quickly sat up on my legs and slid my hands into the gooey knots behind my back, coating the fingers and making the challenge even greater, and before I would loose my nerve, I leaned to the front and fell onto my stomach, causing my legs to snap into the hog-tie position, which pulled the handcuff knot tight, securing my hands and pulling tight against the bedpost… I pulled on my hands and found that the knot had again worked perfectly: I was stuck and the game had begun!

All of the elaborate process of tying myself up had excited me and lying on my stomach, I needed no artificial stimulant. As I squirmed, my dick rubbed against the mat, thus creating another trap: As I struggled to escape, I stimulated myself more and more. Then my mind faced a serious decision: obey the libido or get the knots loose! I had used about half the bottle of glue, and it had run down onto the mat. As I struggled, I felt and heard the constant, “slurp” of the thick, slippery goo as it coated my legs and stomach. It was harder and harder to concentrate on untying the knots as my efforts pushed me closer and closer to cuming. This is why I had left a few less knots… I had to allow time to enjoy the situation before release! As Melissa often teased me, that is one of the disadvantages of being a man: once it’s over… you just feel silly until you can get it up again! After the third knot, my libido won out and I writhed against the unyielding bonds with all my might. A few moments later came the wave of release, pulling every knot tight and stretching every rope to its limit.

After a few seconds to catch my breath, I quickly resumed my task of untying the sticky knots, a task that was getting harder and harder. I knew that even if I did get them free, I’d still have the long squirm across the floor (good for another orgasm!) before I’d be able to cut myself free, and still have time to shower and clean up before Melissa came over.

On knot #9 I froze and felt a huge lump form in my stomach as I heard the door rattle and open with the jingle of keys!

Melissa’s voice called in: “Hello?” followed by the sound of footsteps down the hall.

When she got to the bedroom door, I heard a gasp and a quiet “Oh my God!” She rushed to me and pulled off the blindfold. “What happened?!”

Then she stopped, and a grin slowly spread across her face as she surveyed the room.

“You did this to *yourself*… didn’t you! I can’t believe you actually went through with it!” she squealed. My totally embarrassed expression was all the answer she needed as she burst out in laughter! “and you didn’t expect me until 6:00 did you?”

I shook my head. “Just *what* are you doing here now?” I asked.

“Got to go home early… another girl had to trade shifts.” she replied, appraising the situation. “Besides, if I had known this was waiting, I would have taken time off just to watch!” she giggled. “So I was your ‘safety net’?… hmmm… bad choice, but too late now!”

“I think Scotch is in order.” she said, walking to my kitchen. She & I had shared many bottles of Scotch, and she knew right where the good stuff was. As she left I frantically untied the next knot… but the glue was thickening at its constant rate, despite my own delay. I slowly got one knot free, but knew that it was now going to be very difficult to get the rest undone…if I could at all…

Melissa returned with my best bottle of scotch and a large glass filled with ice. Filling the glass, she said “It looks like you could use a drink!” I replied, still totally humiliated, that indeed, now would probably be a good time. “I don’t want to spill any…” she said as she took a large mouthful and leaning down, pressed her lips to mine, and passed along the 21 year old nectar to my trembling lips. “Good! you didn’t spill any!” she complimented. “How about another?” she stated and repeated the process.

“So just how did you plan on getting loose?” she asked, taking another swig for herself.

I explained about the knots and glue, and the knife in the kitchen. At the part about the glue she cringed. “Ew, that might hurt if it got on hairy spots!” She carefully examined my handiwork as she gave me another shot. “Nice job,… although, hmmmmm……”

On the next shot fed to me, I swallowed awkwardly spilling some of the liquid down my chin.

“Oh!” she shouted, leaping to her feet! “You wasted 21 year old scotch! I’m going to have to punish you for that!” I looked up and she winked. “Any objections?”

My heart skipped a few beats as I realized that one of my greatest fantasies might be ready to come true, as this tall beautiful woman was totally in control, and *wanted* to have fun with me! “I guess I deserve it…” I replied.

“Yes, I’d say you do!” she said. The rapid shots of scotch began to hit as I saw her sandaled feet approach and the black darkness of the blindfold recovered my eyes. “I’ve got to run out and get a few things.” she announced. “be back in a sec.!” and I heard the sound of footsteps followed by the click of the door and lock. I struggled with the knots, and managed to actually undo a couple more, but the time seemed to pass slowly, as it does when you’re immobilized and completely deprived of sight.

Soon I heard the door unlock and open again. “Honey, I’m home!” she called. I heard her set down some bags and soon she padded into the room. I heard her kick off her sandals. As she removed the blindfold, I opened my eyes to a set of perfect, red toenails. She said pitifully, “Still not free… what a shame!”

“If you wouldn’t have come over early, I’d be out by now” I protested.

She frowned. “I’d be a little nicer to me if I were you!” she reminded. “Tell you what… I’ll even give you a second chance! ” She went into the other room and carried in a bag. “I’ll hog-tie you *my* way, and if you can get free, I’ll make it worth your while… but if you can’t get free…”

“Yes?” I queried.

“Well, it *might* be worth MY while!” She smiled wickedly. “And since you’re in no position to bargain, I take it it’s a done deal!” At which point she took out the long, cotton rope. Starting at the elbows, she cinched them close together, wrapping each arm solidly before crossing to the other. As she worked down to my wrists, she gave them a wiggle, and seeing that I’d not be able to offer much resistance, pulled out a penknife and cut loose my glue encrusted bonds. “Man, this stuff is tough to cut when hard… I don’t think you’d have gotten out anyway…” she mussed. Then once the old bonds were free, she let me stretch a bit and massaged my wrists. “You’ll need the break” she explained. Then she continued knitting my arms together and tied each finger to the opposite compliment. Because of the evenness and quantity of her bonds the circulation to my hands was better, but the solid nature of the bonds made it a totally helpless situation.

Then cutting my legs free except for the ankles and toes, she repeated the process on my legs, until I was solidly mummified. “Let’s see, “she said thoughtfully inspecting her work,” you’re always bragging about how you could escape anything…” She then added 15-20 knots to the legs and wrapped a few loops from the ankles to the wrists. Pulling the rope taught, my knees bent and I was forced back into the hog-tie. She tied another 15 or so knots to secure it, then used the remaining rope to wrap the connecting rope tightly to my thighs, rendering me almost completely unable to budge! As a final act, she waved the pocket knife menacingly towards my crotch. “Ever wonder what Bobbit felt like?” she asked evily. Then in one fell swipe, she cut off my boxers… leaving me completely naked. Pushing my helpless body onto its side with her soft foot, she tied a short length of rope from just above my wrists down through between my legs and around the base of my dick. She wrapped the rope around and around, causing it to swell to full proportions. “That will keep you hard and ‘distracted’.”

She walked back to the box of Christmas tree bags and pulled out two more. Snapping them open, she worked one after the other around my bound knees up to my neck. Then she pulled the tie strap sung, but not too tight. “Don’t want you to get cold.” she said comfortingly.

She leaned down and fed me several more mouthfuls of scotch, lingering with her cool wet lips on mine. Again, this continued until a drop escaped, and she again snapped upright. “A repeat offender!” she shouted. “Just for that, no movies!” she sentenced as she pulled two video cassettes from the bag. “and, it looks like you have no incentive to get loose. By the way, I won’t cut you loose… I’ll leave the knife where it was and promise not to impede you, but I won’t help in any way!” Then she reapplied the blindfold.

As she left the room, I started wiggling my fingers, testing the knots. As I heard her fixing a snack in the kitchen, I found that I could get my fingers loose with a little more work, and felt the ropes around my hands. A wave of disappointment washed over me as I felt all of the knots within reach… I probably *could* get out without her help. I felt a little relieved, but also regretted not getting to experience total helplessness.

At this point I heard her bare feet pad back into the room. She tweaked my nose with her toe and said “By the way, since you got to use glue I decided to pick up some goodies at the store while I was out… see if you can guess what this is…”

I felt her hands pulling the bag open and reaching back to my rear. My hands tried to stop her from forcing some conical, plastic object up my butt, but my fingers weren’t free enough yet… I felt something thick and sticky squeeze into my rectum… along with the smell of chocolate.”

“I took a cake decorating class one time…” she mused as she emptied the bag of frosting up me. I had never had an enema, and the sensation felt like a cold, bad case of ‘the runs’. As she removed the tip, I felt the gooey mass ooze out. It was disgusting and humiliating… as I squirmed, it squished out and ran down between my legs. “That’s just so you have a little more incentive.” she said as she gave me a thick chocolate frosting kiss.

She padded out of the room and I heard the can opener open two large cans. I struggled to get my fingers free and managed to get the ones on my right hand loose as she reentered the room.

“Now, now, Mr. Houdini…” she chided. “let me finish before you ‘escape’ ! Time to guess substance number two!” I smelled nachos…

“Mexidips and chips?” I offered.

“Close!” she said as she pulled off the blindfold. In front of me were two 7 lb. cans of cheddar cheese sauce. I swallowed hard and emitted a quiet “eeewww!”

“Aren’t warehouse stores great?” she said with a tone of superiority. “It’s incredible the size of these things… it makes you wonder if they really *meant* for them to be just eaten…” She picked up the first can and began dumping it over my arms, pouring down toward my ankles. The thick, sticky sauce slowly engulfed me, soaking into and between the ropes, both coating me with a oozing, gooey mess and causing the ropes to soften, but also to swell. She puled the bag shut and announced “In ten minutes, I’ll add the other can… if you’re not free…” she added, presenting the possibility of escape. Walking close with her toes by my lips, she commended “Kiss me good-bye…” I knew that she had a foot thing, and I kissed her toes, sucking on them as she slowly wiggled them. I heard her moan quietly, and she said “Now I *know* I better not let you out!” and dumped the second can into the bag, and patting the excess air out, resealed it.

“Don’t worry, there’s more surprises in store!” she added as she slowly padded out of the room.

I tried loosening my other fingers, the thick cheese reducing every action into slow motion. The ropes stuck together, and I felt the cheese stick and suck at me with every move I made. I realized it was a trap better than I could have ever devised myself, and I struggled once more to loosen my bonds. The huge globs of cheese mushed around me and I knew that it would be a chore to clean up… I realized how absolutely ridiculous I must have looked and how strange and wonderful Melissa’s little mind worked! The constant sucking and oozing of the cheese combined with the back and forth motion of my struggles pulled on the rope around my dick and I felt the climb up to orgasm resume. As my breath quickened and I struggled futilly against the bonds I came with a loud moan that went on for what seemed forever, the dick-rope sustaining the orgasm.

When it was finally over, I heard a slow clapping from the doorway… she had quietly crawled back and watched the whole thing! “Way to go!” she congratulated. “you’ve got 5 more minutes until the next treatment… and too many more and the bag will be too heavy to move…”

As I started the slow process of squirming toward her voice and the door, I felt the weight of the goo in the bag and realized that she was right! Not having much slack to work with, I could only squirm forward a half inch or so with each action. “Good!” she said with mock encouragement. “You’ll make it down the hall in… oh… an hour or so at that rate!”

“Don’t you have some movies to watch?” I asked, embarrassed. “None as good as this!” she answered. I continued trying to work free of the ropes as I squirmed, slowly making my way to the door. I was able to undo a couple of knots by the time I reached the doorway. I heard Melissa’s voice chirp “Time!” and then heard her get up and go into the kitchen. More rustling of bags as I frantically worked at the ropes, undoing another knot and feeling the ropes stretching and loosening a tiny bit. Presently soft, bare feet on carpet returned and I felt the bag open.

“Brrr!” I cried as the thick, cold liquid spilled down my back. This was much stickier, it had to be molasses or honey. It kept coming and coming… just how big was this bottle?!? My hands were now a sticky, nearly helpless mess. The tangle of ropes were stuck together with the goo into globs and as she closed the bag, I heard the keys in her pockets jingle. Then I heard the sound of keys in cloth dropping to the floor. Her toes brushed my face as she placed what I gathered to be her shorts over my blindfolded head. “This time the kisses have to work their way up…” she said as she sat down, one leg on each side of me. I felt her toes work their way into my mouth and sucked obligingly. Her other foot caressed my head, massaging and moving it to her will. Then her toes slid out and I felt the soft skin of her calf. Kissing frantically as I worked the knots, she purred with satisfaction. Her feet wrapped over me and began to work the molten bag around me, mixing the gel inside.

Suddenly she stopped, and with a big cleansing breath of fresh air, announced that it was scotch time again. This time I heard her take a few drinks before feeding me my usual two shots. My head was buzzing both from the alcohol as well as from the isolated feeling that the blindfold and bag of stuff provided. I heard the TV come on and the sounds of video tapes being cued up.

“Did I bore you?” I called. “No, I’m just getting hot, and need to keep things going until the next ten minutes!” she called back. I shook off her shorts. This time I made it down the hall maybe ten feet… it was hard to tell with the blindfold and buzzing. Although I had a constant hard-on because of the dick-rope, and my libido constantly pressed onward for more, I tried to focus on the task at hand. Finally, the TV went silent and I heard her return.

A few moments later she returned. “Next!” she said as I felt a soft cloth drop over my head. This was followed by a strangely shaped bit of clothing that despite my situation could instantly be identified as her bra. She laid down on the floor and I felt her arms encircle my head. “Ravage me!” she moaned as I felt her small but firm breasts press to my face. I kissed and licked for all I was good as her hands lifted and guided my head to the desired spots. Her breathing became more and more agitated, and her hands more insisting. The bag clung to me at every point, the thick glue-like liquid now having formed a smooth, thick layer over my whole body. My feet and hands were encased in the oozing mire and it felt like the wonderful, warm inside of a woman. I felt my libido and body surge as I bit into her nipple. She gasped in ecstasy and cried out “Oh, yea!” as my body wrenched with another bone-crushing climax. As her fingers kept frantically running through my hair, I kept cuming, until totally exhausted, I collapsed into her lap.

“Enjoyed ourselves, did we?” she asked. I panted and nodded… it was all I could do.

“…and what about me?” she asked again. I couldn’t speak… I muttered a few syllables.

“Well, take heart… this is the last substance I could afford… but you still have a lot of work to do to make it worth my while” she consoled. With a slight grunt she got up and went into the kitchen. I was too tired to move, every muscle was dead. As I heard her soft footfalls, she sat down again and spoke.

“Your being this tired is no good to me. I’ve only got one piece of clothes left on… want to see?” At this she removed the blindfold. Sure enough, she sat there wearing only a pair of black satin panties. I had seen her in one piece swimsuits but this sight of her was a vision! Her long, slim legs reached past my range of vision over my shoulders, where her feet slowly rested on my shoulders. Sitting up on her elbows, she continued. “…and their getting almost too wet to wear! Now here’s the deal: I’ll add the last goop and then you have however long it takes to make it to the floor of the kitchen. Once there on the floor where the mess will be easier to clean up, I’ll cut you free, I promise. But there will be one obstacle in the way, and you’ll have one last task to perform…can you guess what that is?” Seeing her soaked panties, I raised an eyebrow and licked my upper lip. “Good…” she cooed with a slight quiver in her voice. “Now let’s make this last part a little more difficult!” She replaced the blindfold and I heard the sound of a plastic pail being opened.

“Not ice cream!” I shouted!

“No…” she purred as I smelled the approaching peanut butter, “…not ice cream but that’s the size of a pail they had! Amazing, isn’t it?!!” I felt her slender hands open the bag and scoop in handful after handful of the globby substance, each time mixing the surrounding sticky goo into it. It got thicker and thicker, until it was like tar. “This is *really* disgusting…” she announced. “I wouldn’t want to try to move in that stuff.”

“What if I just decide to give up and sleep here a while? You wouldn’t enjoy that too much, would you?” I said egging her on.

“Oh, so you want to sleep? How about a little ‘snack’ before beddy time?” she said sarcastically. I felt my mouth forced open and a huge scoop of peanut butter stuffed inside. As she forced my mouth closed, it squished out, and I tried to complain about the mess on the floor. Her voice softened in concern for a moment: “Can you still breath o.k.? she asked. I nodded… as long as I didn’t do anything stupid, everything would be o.k. My tongue was mired in the sticky morass inside my mouth and for a few minutes, speech would be impossible. The thought of a food gag had never occurred to me, and despite my exhaustion, I got a little rush. “Now let’s make sure the TV doesn’t keep you awake!” she added. “Nighty, night!” was the last sound I heard before I felt the sticky globs of PB stuffed into my ears. It was one of the most horrible sensations I had experienced as the goo molded its clinging shape to every curve and crevasse of my skin! I was completely unable to do anything about it as she filled my ears completely and smoothed it off, like a master mason. I was now in a completely isolated world, unable to hear more than muffled sounds, unable to see, unable to feel anything but the gooey mass around me and unable to speak. She touched my mouth and I chewed and eventually was able to make sounds, although my dry tongue stuck to my mouth. I felt her move close to my ear and heard a muffled “Can you speak enough to call if you need me?” I grunted affirmatively and felt a kiss on my forehead and felt the floor vibrate as she walked away.

From this point on, time had no meaning. After unsuccessfully trying to shake the PB out of my ears, I rested for some span of time maybe even dozing off a bit. Finally, I felt strength enough to resume my slow path to the kitchen. I knew the sooner I passed the final obstacle, the sooner I’d be released and get the PB out of my ears! It was a real annoying sensation and a terrific incentive! I bumped into the walls several times, totally disoriented by this point. I heard the muffled sounds of the TV and knew that I had made it out of the hall and into the Dining area. I had no clue as to time and hoped that I was heading in the right direction. The heavy mass of glop around me made every motion ten times more difficult… the knots of the rope were a solid, gooey mass with no hope of being untied. My only chance was to make it to the safe spot of the linoleum kitchen floor.

With each squirm I hoped to feel its cool, smooth clean surface, but instead felt only carpet. I bumped into a wall.

Moving left, I touched the phone table and knew I was off my target by almost ten feet! I heard a muffled laugh, and a soft foot pushed my shoulders toward the right direction. This new touch reawoke my libido, and as I crawled through my endless sucking morass, my chin felt a scrap of cloth, and I smelled the wet scent of a woman aroused.

As I worked my way forward, I felt a smooth calf on my cheek. As I had expected, Melissa was sitting right in front of the kitchen and the only way to safety was through her thighs. Kissing and licking as I made my way up her legs, I felt her writhing body, hot and sweaty. When I passed her knees, I felt her now wet, sticky fingers caress my face. Then with such relief, I felt her fingers scoop out my ears. Sound rushed in and I felt as though I was reborn again. The first sound I heard was her moans and breathy command “Don’t… stop!…” I resumed the task of eating my way up her leg until I reached the wettest, stickiest spot I’d encountered all day! I had never encountered a woman who was as soaked and sticky as she was! As I approached, her hands grabbed my hair and pulled my mouth deep into her. She writhed and moaned as she held my head firmly, covering my face with her juice. As I licked and licked, my face was soon covered in a coating of her. While her moans became louder and nearer, I beginning to squirm myself, aroused to a climax even greater than before! Finally, after a minute or more of this, I exploded, briefly stopping my actions on her. “If you stop now, I’ll never let you out!” She shrieked, rubbing my face into her crotch. Frantically, I continued as best I could and felt another wave of release wash over me as I was forced to service my Mistress. She gasped one last long breath and started a long, growing moan that lasted seemingly forever! Finally, she collapsed, and pulled off my blindfold. I looked up at her wide smile and knew my sentence was fulfilled. After cutting one hand free, she dropped the knife and I knew I still had at least a half hour of hard work ahead… plus a mess to clean up… but watching Melissa pick up her clothes and get dressed, I could only smile. She wiped the peanut butter off her thighs, and gave me a wink. “You going to be ok?” she asked. Summoning all of my remaining strength, I nodded. Melissa blew a kiss as she walked to the door with a final warning: “Good, because next time, I won’t be so nice!”

Last Orders

— by Anonymous —

It’d been a great night out. At ten o’clock Emma mentioned that she was quite hungry and suggested we have a late meal at her favourite restaurant that was nearby.

We were greeted at the restaurant by an athletic looking girl in her late twenties; she had a gorgeous blonde bob which framed her pretty face and was dressed in a crisp white linen shirt and a long white apron hiding most of her short pink skirt. Emma introduced to me Jenny who showed us swiftly to a table near the back. The restaurant was buzzing.

I enjoyed the food I ordered, but couldn’t keep my eyes off Emma. She was dressed for seduction; and she knew exactly what would turn me on. She had a short tightly fitting black skirt and black tights; her low cut black sweater was pure long fluffy mohair; her hair was long, straight, dark and full of body and shine. She played with her hair constantly as she talked with me – knowing that I wanted to do the same. She occasionally blew gently onto her generous breasts to see my reaction as the fluffy mohair danced in front of my eyes.

It was late by the time we’d finished our fresh turbot; we were the only diners left in the restaurant. Jenny walked over to our table smiling infectiously. “Would you like some dessert Emma?”, she asked. “Yes, I think I shall. And you must have some too”, Emma directed me. I was quite full – but what the hell!

Ten minutes later Emma’s dessert arrived. I had to do a double-take. Jenny put two bowls on the table, each fifteen inches in diameter and each piled at least ten inches high with banana cream pie. “You did order the SPECIAL, Emma”, Jenny inquired. “Absolutely” Emma answered and then looked at me …. “Now watch this. Jenny will show you exactly how I like my banana cream pie.”

Jenny took a pie in each hand and stood behind Emma. Emma smiled at me, licked her lips and rubbed her fingers over her mohair covered tits. Jenny thundered both pies at Emma, one coming from each side of her face …. the pies went everywhere. Jenny made sure that Emma had been well smeared with pie – especially her face, hair and all over her lovely mohair jumper.

Emma spoke through an inch of cream on her face, “What did you order darling? It must be coming soon!”. Jenny was soon back with my dessert. Chocolate cream gateaux. The cake was as large as one of Emma’s banana cream pies, and Jenny placed it right in front of me. “I think you might need some help”, suggested Emma, and in a second she was standing behind me. I noticed that banana cream pie had covered the front of her skirt and dripped over her black tights also. She placed her pied arms around my neck and brought her creamy face close to mine.

“Now, in a moment I’m going to kneel in front of you and unzip that big cock of yours. Jenny is going to stand behind you like I am now, and force your head into all of that gooey chocy cream. Does that turn you on?”. What a stupid question. And so Emma gave me the most erotic banana cream pie blow-job … and Jenny slowly pushed my willing face into the chocolatey depths of the cream cake. After a few seconds, I was aware that the back of my head was the target for the extra chocolate sauce I’d ordered. It poured and poured … I felt it ooze down my neck well inside my shirt.

Just before I came to climax, Emma removed me from her mouth and pushed me to the floor on my back. “Now we do some real pie fucking”, she cried, and pushed my throbbing cock inside her sodden knickers to her hot fur zone. She wrapped her banana pie covered mohair arms around my neck and pulled me close to her smiling face. I erupted inside her as her tongue pushed deep into my mouth.

Allie’s Bet

— by Anonymous —

Allie should have known better than to bet on St. Stephen’s. A professor of psychology at Florida Tech, Allie was none the less torn when her alma mater, St. Stephen’s U. was slated to play a 1st round NCAA tournament basketball game against her current employer. Giving her more grief than anyone that week was her graduate assistant, Heather. Ultimately, a wager was made, with Heather setting the terms. “If you win I promise to enter the case file archives on my own time, before Spring Break begins…”

“Sounds great!” perked up Allie, temporarily forgetting that St. Steve’s was a 15th seed in the Southeast bracket. “What’s in it for you, Heather?”

Turning mischievously toward Allie, Heather grinned and said “Well, chief, let’s just say that if I win, I own your ass for the rest of the day.”

Allie gulped. “I’m not sure I get what you mean?” she asked half-worried, half-intrigued.

“Nothing major” Heather responded re-assuringly. “It’s just that it’s been a long year, and by your own admission, you work me like a dog. I just want a little payback. Don’t worry, it’ll all be in good fun. Besides, don’t you have any faith in your alma mater?”

“We’ll kick your ass!” shot back Allie instinctively “You’re on!”

The NCAA Tournament is notorious for early round upsets. However, this one was not to be. The final score Florida Tech 78 St. Steve’s 67. Almost immediately after the final buzzer, Allie’s phone rang. “Put on your Sunday best, chief.” It was Heather, speaking in a stern monotone “I’ll pick you up in precisely one hour. We’re going to Artaud’s, your treat.”

“Artaud’s, Heather? You’re not gonna be cheap tonight, are you?”

“Just be ready.” With that Allie proceeded to take a shower and get dressed. After getting ready, she stopped to admire herself. Though she had just hit the big 3-0, Allie didn’t look much older than the students she was teaching. Her shoulder length dirty-blond bob, green eyes and pouty lips perfectly offset her porcelain skin. She was dressed in a strapless, floral pattern dress that came to just above her knees, thigh-high suntan stockings, and a pair of strappy, white high-heeled sandals. Sipping a glass of white zinfandel, swaying to Lorena McKennitt’s “All Souls Night”, Allie fixated upon the image gazing back at her from the full-length mirror. “Mmmm….I could make love to myself all night long” she thought to herself.

BZZZZZZZZZ…..the doorbell rang. “Come in! It’s unlocked!” Allie shouted. It was Heather, but not like any Heather Allie had seen before. To say Heather dressed casually around the office was an understatement, but tonight…Wow, what a difference. Heather was beautiful by any standard. Her long, brown curly hair was flecked with sun-bleached blond. Her piercing green eyes, Mediterranean complexion, and button nose made for an extremely appealing combination of cute and exotic. She was wearing a little, black cocktail dress, black garter and stockings, and a pair of black high-heeled ankle strap sandals.

“Hi chief! Ready for Artaud’s ?”

“Uh sure, Heather. I have to say you look really nice tonight.”

“You don’t look half bad yourself, chief…I mean Allie…I forgot, I’m in charge tonight”

“By the way, Heather, what’s the deal with tonight?”

“Well, I thought you’d treat me to a nice little meal and some wine.” replied Heather innocently “And then?…”asked Allie with a hint of concern

“Now that’s the fun part. Don’t think I’m going to spoil the surprise!”

One expensive dinner and almost two bottles of wine later, Allie and Heather arrived back at Heather’s house. Allie was now a little tipsy and wondering just what Heather had in mind. Was Heather trying to seduce her? The thought had Allie more than a little nervous, yet somehow it seemed intriguing. Allie had never fantasized about a woman before, but Allie had to admit that her eyes kept wandering back to Heather. Then again, she thought “Maybe I’m overreacting”.

Heather could sense the tension surging through Allie. It was now time to take control. “Allie?”

“Yes?”

“The time is now.” Heather spoke in a firm but almost hypnotically relaxing tone of voice. “I know you’re probably a little nervous about what is going to happen to you shortly. I want you to relax. I need you to surrender to my will. Listen to me and enjoy the ride. Are you ready?”

“Yes” said Allie breathily

“Good. First I must blindfold you.” Heather then tied a silk sash over Allie ‘s eyes. “Now follow me.” Heather took Allie by the hand a led her down a flight of stairs. Once downstairs, Heather commanded Allie to get down on all fours. The drones of the Velvet Underground’s first album played in the background, lending a foreboding ambiance to the occasion. Over the drones, Allie seemed to hear a second pair of footsteps. She then felt a sandal clad foot graze softly against her cheek, then lips. The three criss-cross toe straps and nylon-clad toes seemed to feel like how she remembered Heather’s feet looked.

Heather’s voice cooed seductively “Allie, I want you to use that sexy tongue on my foot. Make love to it the way I know you want to.” Allie then took the foot in her hands. She started to lightly kiss each toe, before using her tongue to explore each space between toes. Massaging the instep with her hand, Allie started sucking the toes, her tongue sandwiched between the nylon-clad toes and the sole of the sandal. The sighs of pleasure coming from above, the wine, and the droning music were combining to make Allie feel alive in a way she had never quite felt before. At this point, she wanted nothing more than to rip off the blindfold and ravish Heather. As her tongue worked its way up the foot to the ankle, Allie could feel that she was getting wet between her legs…

All of a sudden, Allie felt a pair of lingerie clad breast gently stroke against…her back?? Allie could feel Heather’s warm, sweet breath in her left ear as she said in a voice barely above a whisper. “You’re doing wonderfully, my little flower….I’m going to remove your blindfold now.” When the blindfold was removed, Allie looked up. “Oh my god….” , she thought.

It was Wendy, her top student, looking down on her, with a look of satisfaction. She looked like an angel, her long strawberry blond hair winged back revealing her gorgeous baby blue faraway eyes, and lightly freckled skin. She was clad in a white teddy, a white garter, suntan stockings and a pair of white high-heeled ankle strap sandals that were identical to Heather’s in all but color.

Heather then swung around to face Allie. She was now dressed in a black teddy, in fact she was dressed like a negative image of Wendy. She got behind Wendy, straddled her, and lightly kissed her cheek while stroking her hair. Wendy sighed deeply, and then turned her head to kiss Heather sweetly on the lips. Heather then turned her attention to Allie. “Allie, I hope you don’t mind. Wendy is here to earn extra credit assisting me tonight. With your approval, of course.”

Allie looked up at Wendy. She had a puppy dog look of anticipation on her face. “Oh… why not!” Allie sighed, trying to hide any looks of infatuation. She was now completely disoriented. Allie felt very embarrassed, yet aroused. She had no idea what was next. Heather then nodded to Wendy, who then proceeded to take Allie by the hand and lead her to a support beam. Wendy then used the silk sash to loosely tie Allie to the support beam, hands behind her back. Heather then walked up to Allie and started caressing her.

“Allie, I had a wonderful time tonight at dinner.” Heather cooed as she moved her lips tantalizingly close to Allie’ s. “But it was missing just one thing”

“What would that be?” Allie purred seductively, her eyes locked in a longing gaze with the luscious brunette temptress.

“Why dessert, of course!” With that Heather took the de-tinned banana cream pie Wendy had slipped her, and sensuously smeared it in Allie’s face. As the cool cream exploded across her face, Allie felt a shudder go throughout her body. Impulsively, she licked Heather’s cream and crust covered fingers. “Allie!” giggled Heather, slightly taken aback “You really seemed to enjoy that, you wildwoman. This is gonna be fun. Ohhh Wendy. Please be a dear and clean off our guest’s eyes. It’s time for you to earn your extra credit.”

Wendy then reemerged with a rolling tray loaded with dozens of cream pies of various flavors. Heather then produced a chair for Allie to sit on. “Have you ever had a lap dance, Allie?” asked Heather. Allie shook her head no. “Well, Wendy’s dying to give you one. Don’t you think she’s beautiful?”

“Without question.” Allie looked straight at Wendy and said invitingly “I’m all yours. Don’t hold anything back.” Wendy broke out into a big grin, like a little kid just about to open her Christmas presents, she turned toward Heather who nodded approvingly, and then picked up a heaping key lime pie. She then walked over to Allie , sat down on her lap, cleared the pie left on her face, and then kissed her passionately on the lips.

Wendy then forcefully smushed the Key Lime Pie right in Allie’s kisser. Allie moaned appreciatively. Then Wendy pulled her teddy down, exposing her voluptuous breasts. She grabbed Allie by the back of her head and pulled her face toward her chest and started to grind away. “No wonder men have such a thing about big breasts” Allie thought to herself. Wendy slowly pulled away and again gave Allie a long, slow, wet kiss, getting a little white cream and green filling on her face in the process. As she saw Wendy’s face, Allie began to hope fervently she would have a chance to return the pieing. For the time being, this was out of her hands.

Wendy grabbed two whipped cream topped cherry pies and pied Allie’s breasts, making sure the bulk of the mess got inside her dress. She then massaged Allie’s chest, working in the cream and cherry filling. After another long kiss, Wendy got up and started obliterating Allie’s dress with a mix of chocolate cream, and lemon meringue pies. When she was finished, Wendy paused for a moment to admire her work. She then unzipped Allie’s dress and slowly wriggled it off her.

Allie was now stripped down to only her little white panties, stockings and sandals. Wendy then removed her teddy altogether, exposing her neatly trimmed bush. Picking up an extraordinarily thick and gooey marshmallow cream pie out of its tin with both hands, Wendy then straddled Allie and gently pushed the pie into her face, completely obliterating her features. With two heaping handfuls of excess pie cream, Wendy massaged Allie’s bare chest, paying special attention to her deliciously pointed nipples.

As she did this, Allie began to notice Wendy was getting rather moist between her legs. Seemingly reading Allie’s mind, Wendy took a pie covered finger to her wet mound. She then offered the scented finger to her captive, who ecstatically slurped it up. Wendy then dipped her hand into another marshmallow cream pie and pulled out a giant handful. Allie braced herself for what was coming. Wendy smashed the pie cream into Allie’s crotch, fingering her clitoris as she worked the cream in. Allie started breathing harder and harder as first one and then two fingers penetrated her sugar walls. The two women’s bodies rubbed against each other, lubricated with sweat and pie cream. As Allie approached orgasm, time seemed to stop. As waves of ectascy began to reverberate from her vagina, Wendy smashed a de-tinned banana cream pie right into Allie’s face. The impact of the creamy pie intensified the orgasm to such a degree that Allie let out a scream of pure ecstasy.

As the two of them caught their breath, Heather re-emerged, thrilled with Wendy’s performance. She walked over to the couple and reached out to Wendy, who took her hand and got up. Allie felt a twinge of jealousy as Heather started kissing and caressing Wendy, occasionally pausing to look at Allie devilishly, as if to say “You lost our bet, remember?” “So Allie, how did my little angel do tonight?” asked Heather, while still focusing her eyes and hands on the lovely Wendy.

“She was wonderful.” said Allie warmly “If you untie me, I could show her my appreciation up close and personal.”

“Now come on Allie. I did win the bet. I’ll do the rewarding around here.” said Heather as she moved her hand down to Wendy’s mound. “But I’ll tell you what I’ll do. I’ll let you share the reward with Wendy. Wendy, if you want to share your reward with your new playmate, untie her and bring her over to the sofa” Wendy’s and Allie’s eyes both lit up. Allie licked her pie covered lips. Wendy walked over, untied Allie and the two lovers embraced. Wendy then dropped to her knees, hooked Allie’s panties around her thumbs, and yanked them down. She then stuck her nose between Allie’s legs and smelled her womanhood.

“I said the sofa Wendy!” said Heather, pointing to the couch in the corner. Wendy and Allie walked over to the sofa hand in hand. Wendy then sat Allie down , sat on her lap, and put her arm around her. Heather then sat down next to Allie and pulled out a 2 ft sheet cake with extra frosting off the pie cart. Allie and Wendy put their heads together, with their faces side by side, both tingling with anticipation.

Heather held the cake about 4 inches from their faces, psyching them out several times before plunging the gooey confection deep into their waiting faces. Heather swirled the cake sheet around for maximum coverage before slowly removing the cake sheet. Both women cleared their eyes, looked at each other’s completely frosting covered face, and got instantly wet. Allie kissed Wendy full on the lips, and the two of them rubbed their faces against each other, further smearing the frosting.

Heather then took a pair of key lime pies and plastered them to Wendy’s chest. She did likewise to Allie with a pair of coconut cream pies. This was followed up with a cherry cream pie to each girl’s stomach. As the pies hit, the telephone rang.

“I can’t believe this!” shouted Heather “I was just getting started! Look ladies, I’m gonna take this call upstairs. Here’s a tray of marshmallow cream pies to keep you busy. Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do.”

Once Heather left the room, Wendy finally spoke up. “I can’t believe we’re doing this! This is so crazy!”

“You mean having a naked pie fight with your Psych professor?”

“Yeah that…I mean I’ve never made love to a woman before and if you don’t want to…I mean I want to…make love to you…but…”

“Of course I want to make love to you” Allie said reassuringly as she took Wendy’s hand “Look, no matter what happens after tonight, don’t worry about it, tonight nothing’s off limits” Allie then kissed Wendy on the cheek and rearranged their sitting position so that both women were seated on the sofa facing each other, legs spread, vaginal lips touching. Allie wiped Wendy’s face clean and then her own.

She then reached over and grabbed two pies, handed one to Wendy, and kept one for herself, which both lovers both promptly de-tinned. “Wendy, my love” Allie cooed affectionately “I want to thank you for the hottest, the funniest, and the sexiest experience of my life. This exchange of pies will symbolize our mutual exploration of each other this evening.” With that the two lovers slowly and sensually pied each others face, smearing the marshmallow cream and crust in a circular motion, while simultaneously grinding their two wet pussies together. Allie and Wendy slowly opened their eyes to look at each other, avoiding wiping their eyes clear to preserve maximum facial coverage. Wendy’s face was completely covered in white with the exception of her open eyes and slightly open mouth, and her hair was streaked with pie cream. Allie’s face was also totally pie covered with a stubborn piece of crust still stuck to her left cheek, her dirty blond hair sticky with pie. The sight of each others pie covered faces caused the two lovers to speed up their perfectly rhythmic thrusting. Allie was so worked up, she grabbed Wendy by the hair and pulled her close for an intense, seemingly endless french kiss. After the kiss, Wendy reached over for another pie and handed it to Allie. “Allie, I’m gonna cum anytime now. When I say now, let me have it. Pie my face like its never been pied before.”

“Anything for you, you little vixen. Just close your eyes and let me take you to heaven” Wendy closed her eyes, and Allie picked up a second pie. She held both pies tantalizingly close to Wendy’s face while Wendy wrapped her arms tightly around Allie’s waist. Both women were breathing rapidly and moaning. Wendy was starting to scream “Oh…oh yeah…harder…oh yeah…oh…oh..oh..NOW!” At that moment, Allie smushed both pies into Wendy’s face and hair, as both lovers came simultaneously. “Oh Allie, I love you.” cooed Wendy as the two lovers embraced.

Now lying on top of Allie, Wendy started softly kissing her face all over, gradually working her way down her neck to Allie’s small, but perky breasts. Wendy gently licked and nibbled at each nipple, driving Allie crazy with lust. She then got off Allie and kneeled on the floor in front of the sofa. Wendy picked up a tub of Cool Whip, spread her lover’s legs, and then proceeded to empty the entire contents on Allie’s spread pussy. “I am now going to give myself a hair-pie in the face” Wendy solemnly proclaimed, and with that dove face first into the Cool Whip. Her tongue worked fast and furious, darting in and out of Allie’s folds, teasing her clit. Allie seethed with passion as her lover brought her to new peaks of ectascy. It was the best oral sex Allie had ever had in her life. Wendy seemed to instinctively know Allie’s little pleasure spots. As she began to focus on Allie’s clit , Wendy could feel her lover’s legs wrapping around her head tighter. Allie was thrusting her womanhood with increasing intensity, fucking Wendy’s creamy face. As the thunderous orgasm approached, Allie took another cream pie and pied herself forcefully. Wendy soon came up for air, climbing back on the loveseat, embracing her lover and kissing her, giving Allie a taste of herself, as their tongues intermingled.

Allie then reached over for another marshmallow cream confection, and lovingly pied Wendy’s face yet again. “Hey, what was that for?” asked Wendy

“No reason.” replied Allie “I just love pieing your gorgeous little face. Are you enjoying it?”

“Totally. All those pies were originally meant for you. But when I put that first key lime pie in your face, I knew that I had to experience what you were feeling myself. When Heather put that cake in our faces, I could hardly control myself, it felt so good. Each pie you hit me with just makes me want you more. I’m looking at you now, all messy and everything, and it puts me in heat. I love the expression you make right after I pie you, all indignant at first, then ecstatic.” Changing the subject, Wendy continued “I have a confession to make, Allie. In class, I can’t keep my eyes off you. I love those short skirts you always wear to show off your legs, and you always have the sexiest, strappiest sandals on. That’s why I started dressing like that. I figured that if you were turning me on , you must be driving the guys wild. I never thought about actually…getting together…with you, but when Heather found out I worked at a bakery part-time and set up this deal…I asked to be a part of it. Heather asked me if I would be willing to fool around with her a little tonight, in the spirit of fun. I told her I had never fooled around with women, but that I had an open mind. She said ‘Cool. Things could get interesting between the three of us’.”

“Yeah, what happened to Heather? She’s missing her own party.” “She’s probably arguing with that asshole boyfriend of hers, Allie. I don’t know why she keeps putting up with him. Who needs men anyway? Let’s 69, teech!”

“That’s one phrase I didn’t think I’d hear this semester.”

“Well that calls for another round of pies, if I do say so myself.”

With that Wendy and Allie stood up. They each took two extra-large banana cream pies and de-tinned them, and then stood facing each other toe to suntan stockinged, strappy white high heeled sandaled toe. On a three count, each girl pied the other’s face with their right hand and the other’s pussy with their left. The pies were smeared slowly and sensually for about thirty seconds, as Wendy and Allie moaned and sucked each other’s fingers. As they did this, excess pie cream dripped down their legs onto their feet and wiggling toes.

“Oh dear, what a mess.” sighed Allie, with mock sincerity “This will never do.” Allie led the still blinded-by-pie Wendy back to the loveseat and laid her down. Laying down opposite her, Allie started licking Wendy’s pie covered sandals. Wendy followed suit and took Allie’s nylon clad tootsies into her mouth, fulfilling yet another fantasy.

“Mmmm…not only do you have beautiful feet to look at, Allie, they taste great, too.” said Wendy playfully.

“Yeah, your tootsies are pretty tasty, too. But I bet your sweet, young pussy is even tastier.” moaned Allie sexily.

“You’ve got a point there, Allie.” The two lovers, lubricated with pie cream, slid their faces into mutual muff dive position. Allie’s tongue went to work on Wendy’s folds as Wendy teased Allie’s clit with soft kisses. The two lovers ate each other out with gusto, building up to near peaks, periodically slackening the pace to prolong the sensations. Wendy and Allie starting slurping each other’s throbbing clits with increasing speed and intensity, finally exploding in a violent crescendo of thrusting, grunting and moaning. The two lovers experienced a mutual, simultaneous orgasm that seemed to fuse their two bodies together, as what felt like an electrical current surged through their bodies. Afterwards, Allie spun around and silently cuddled with Wendy, as the two lovers caught their breath. Both knew that they had just shared the greatest erotic experience of their lifetime…and it wasn’t over yet. There was still over 30 pies and two more cakes on the cart, and one thoroughly unpied brunette to play with.

Allie and Wendy took turns toweling each other off, totally clearing their faces and getting most of the accumulated pie off their bodies. Wendy put her white teddy back on, as Allie de-tinned the rest of the pies. “I can’t wait for Heather to get back down here.” mused Allie “We’re gonna give her the pieing of a lifetime.”

“Among other things.” said Wendy as she walked over to a remote corner of the basement and picked up a strap-on dildo.

“My lord! What did Heather have planned for you anyway!?” “She is so bad.” giggled Allie, as she took the dildo from Wendy “I think we might have to turn the tables a little bit.”

“You mean, give her a little taste of your medicine” cooed Wendy, as she stroked Allie’s bush ” I think she’ll like that.”

“Wendy, I think I hear her coming. Just follow my lead.” Allie then proceeded to strap on the dildo, which had a french tickler used to get the wearer off, and loosely wrapped a towel around herself, in order to conceal it.

Heather came down the stairs wearing a smug smile. “Ladies, I finally did it!” she announced “I dumped that scumbag! I’m a free woman!”

“Congratulations, Heather! It took you long enough.” responded Allie “You missed a great pie fight. Wendy and I are gonna go shower up and grab some coffee. Wanna join us?”

“Hold on!” shouted Heather “What about our bet?!”

“Well, I took you out to dinner, and Wendy took care of pieing me.” Allie offered teasingly “Believe me, I was totally pied. What else did you plan to subject me to?”

“Well…uh…” stammered Heather, suddenly turning shy “I didn’t really get a chance… to pie you the way I wanted to.”

“So this is about pies.” said Allie, feigning disappointment. Taking a hold of Heather’s hands, she moved in for the kill “I thought you might have wanted to make love to me.” Turning towards Wendy, she continued “Oh well. Wendy have you ever tried Java Hut’s double expresso. C’est magnifique!”

As Wendy and Allie walked towards the stairs, Heather cried out anxiously. “Wait! Won’t you both please stay a little longer?” Wendy and Allie looked at each other, giggled, and then slowly walked over to Heather.

As Wendy gently massaged Heather’s shoulders, Allie got up close to her prey. “The question, my lovely Heather, is how bad do you want us?” Allie then reached for a pie and held it mere inches from Heather’s face “Would you let me take this thick, gooey lemon meringue pie and rub it in your face?”

Heather looked her tormentor straight in the eyes and replied seductively “With pleasure.” Allie pushed the pie into Heather’s waiting face, twirling the crust in a circular motion. As she removed her hand, the pieces of crust slowly slid off, leaving Heather’s gorgeous face a gooey swirl of lemon custard and white cream. Heather muttered an almost inaudible “Wow” , as the sensation of the cool, gooey mess on her face made her tingle all over.

Allie then picked up a coconut cream pie. “Would you like me to pie you again?” Allie purred “You look so cute with a pie-face, I could just eat you up.”

Heather licked her lips thinking of her mentor’s face between her legs, and responded “Let me have it!” Allie pied Heather’s face forcefully, pushing her back into Wendy’s waiting arms.

Wendy started to nibble on Heather’s pie-covered ear, driving her crazy with lust. “Mmmm, you taste good.” Wendy whispered softly “But I’d love to see how you wear banana cream”

“Ohhh, that’s my favorite flavor” murmured Heather as she picked out the thickest, gooiest banana cream pie off the rack and handed it to Wendy. “Please do me the honor of putting this in my face.” Wendy happily obliged, smearing the overloaded pie all around her friend’s face as she rubbed her barely concealed breasts on Heather’s back. Wendy used the excess pie cream on Heather’s teddy-covered breasts, causing her to gasp and moan.

Still blinded with banana cream pie, Heather did not see Allie approach with two chocolate cream pies. Wendy pulled Heather’s teddy down to her ankles, as Allie delivered a pie to each bare breast. “Oh god…that feels so good.” Heather moaned as Allie massaged her gooey pie-covered breasts. As Allie stroked and pinched Heather’s deliciously hard nipples, Wendy picked up two cool whip loaded cherry cream pies. She smashed one pie into Heather’s dripping wet pussy and the other into her firm ass. After helping Wendy massage the cream and cherry filling into Heather’s hot, wet pussy, Allie dropped to her knees and started furiously eating her out. Wendy started licking Heather’s face clean, pausing occasionally to passionately french kiss her. Heather, between moaning and biting her lower lip, managed to pull down Wendy’s teddy and feel up her ample breasts. As Heather moved closer to orgasm, Wendy picked up two marshmallow cream pies and handed one to Heather. Seconds later, Heather started to scream. “Oh..oh..oh..OH..OH” SPLAT!! Wendy and Heather smashed the pies in each other’s faces, and marshmallow cream flew everywhere. The pie in the face triggered the most intense orgasm Heather had ever experienced, as she rode Allie’s face for all she was worth.

When Allie stood up, Heather rewarded her with a lovingly rubbed in faceful of banana cream pie. Allie then picked up two key lime pies and pied Heather’s and Wendy’s faces simultaneously. Heather and Wendy retaliated, taking turns pieing Allie’s face and body with a series of cool whip pies.

Allie then took Heather by the hand and led her to the sofa. Unwrapping the towel, Heather discovered the dildo strapped to Allie. “Oh my God!” shrieked Heather “I forgot all about that thing!”

“Do you want me to use it on you, cupcake?” Heather smiled mischievously , spread her legs, fingered her pussy, and said playfully “Climb aboard, pardner” Allie mounted Heather, who let out a soft gasp as she was being penetrated. With each thrust, Allie got deeper inside Heather. Soon, the lovers got into rhythmic unison, with Heather’s legs wrapped tightly around Allie. They embraced and kissed passionately, their erect nipples grinding against each other.

Wendy, wanting to take part, picked up another 2ft long double-frosted sheet cake. After getting Allie and Heather to turn their heads sideways, Wendy gently pushed the cake into their faces. The two lovers enthusiastically ground their faces into the cake for maximum coverage, before french kissing once again. Wendy took the extra cake and rubbed it all over Allie’s and Heather’s respective chests. Allie’s thrusting was picking up intensity, as both lover’s moans turned to screams. At the moment of climax, Wendy smashed coconut cream pies in both Allie’s and Heather’s faces, vigorously rubbing them in.

After cooling down, and exchanging one more passionate kiss, Allie and Heather turned their attention to their virtually clean prize student. Heather walked over to the pie cart and picked up two huge lemon meringue pies. After handing one to Allie, they proceeded to give Wendy a very messy pie in the face sandwich. They then sandwiched Wendy’s clean body against their pie covered bodies and ground away, messing her up some more.

After removing Wendy’s teddy altogether, Allie picked up the last 2ft sheet cake and smashed it into Wendy’s chest, totally covering not Wendy’s large breasts, but her tight stomach and neatly trimmed bush with gooey cream. Leading Wendy over to the sofa, Heather spread her legs and began eating her out. Allie concentrated on Wendy’s breasts licking, sucking on, and lightly biting her erect cake-covered nipples.

After a few minutes of this, Heather pulled away and strapped on the dildo. Laying down on the sofa, she had Wendy get on top of her. Wendy guided the dildo inside her and started grinding away. Allie steered the pie cart over to the side of the sofa, and then proceeded to straddle Heather’s face, facing Wendy. Picking up a banana cream pie, Allie slowly and deliberately pied Wendy’s face. Wendy returned the favor and slowly pied Allie’s face with a chocolate cream pie. Each pie in the face was followed by a long, wet, sloppy kiss.

The erotic, tit-for-tat cream pie facial exchange continued until there were but three marshmallow cream pies left. As all three lovers, reached a scarifying climax Wendy and Allie pied each other in the face one final time, as a warm orgasmic rush told a hold of their bodies. Climbing off of Heather, the three lovers sat next to each other, exhausted, but completely satisfied.

As a coda to this most carnal of nights, Allie picked up the final pie. “Heather.” Allie intoned “This night together with the three of us was the most fun I’ve ever had. I’m pretty sure that’s the case with all three of us. Because this was your idea, to show our gratitude, Wendy and I would like to present you with this final pie.” Wendy and Allie then took the final pie and slowly smeared it in Heather’s face for a full minute, and followed it up with a final group hug before collapsing exhausted, into a pile. New doors were opened for all three women that night. The three women would remain close in both their professional and personal lives. Their newly discovered bi-sexuality, and pie-sexuality, would lead each to frequently re-live the experience and share it with other partners as well. But that’s another story.

Star-crossed WAMmers

— by Andrew —

The following post is a series of E-mails from a boy in the US and a girl in Australia. This is a private CYBER-WAM batttle that we agreed to share with you all. I have excluded the names to protect the innocent. (ha ha) There are many other details in the e-mails other than the CYBER-WAM, but maybe we’ll post that next week…

*The boy wrote:*

Let us have a cyber food fight!

I smash you in the face with a banana cream pie. But not too bad, You wipe it from your smiling face and reach for…

*The girl wrote:*

Ha! The WAM equivalent of cyber sex?? Hell yeah, I’m up for it! And hey you started it..

An absolutely HUGE thick and gooey good ole plain cream pie. I’m laughing my head off and enjoying myself, but at the same time I am hell bent on getting revenge on you!! Advancing towards you slowly, I having trouble seeing through all of the mess on my face, but somehow manage with one hand to grab you behind the head and with the other hand I squash the pie into your face, hard! You’re pulling away but I am going to cream you real good to get you back for pieing me! I twist and squelch the pie in your face and thick globs of crust and thick cream ooze out the sides. And then……

Your shot, hon! Give it to me!

happily wiping the mess from her face….

*The boy wrote:*

Ok, you got me… but, I manage to pull away and clear off the small amount of goop from my face. Not too bad – I could still go out in public like this. But you look like you need another pie, or two. I Grab two not-so-standard-home-made-pies (custard, pancake syrup, and whipped cream) and smash them on either side of your head – smearing them toward your face. The slime splashes up over your head and covers the back of your neck! OK, You’ve probably cum by now, but I aint done with you yet! And you seem disoriented a bit – what could you do to me?

GUNGE you later…

*The girl wrote:*

I love being messy, but I can tell that compared to you that my face is a total mess and that you are still relatively clean. This has got to be rectified!! I am as hopping mad and loving this full-on food fight! I push you back onto the bed and tie your legs to the wrought iron posts. You are putting up a LAME attempt at resistance and I can tell you are trying to tell me something but everything is muffled through the whipped cream that is layered over my ears. I am about to tie your hands as well… but I want them too be free to gunge me later, so I decide to leave them for the moment. I wander out to the kitchen, grab a HUGE mixing bowl and start to dump goo into it. Vanilla yogurt, thick cream, and gooey pudding mix. Finally it is full to the brim and I pick it up with difficulty. I don’t want to spill any of it… yet…! Heading back to the bedroom, you see me coming and sit up. I can see that you are VERY hard. (There are a whole lot of pies and other goodies in reaching distance but you don’t seem to have noticed that yet… lucky for me!!) You’re sitting upright and I’m enjoying having you at my mercy! I put on my sweetest, most charming voice and say, “Now dear, I’m sure that you’d like to try some pudding, now wouldn’t you…?” You’re smiling but at the same time looking very worried and shaking your head side to side vigorously “no”. Ha! I grin and swing the bowl back, and SPLASH, hit you full on with the goop! The whole of your front is COMPLETELY messed up (as well as half the bed but never mind). You’re still sitting upright with a look of shock on your face and I go sit on your cock and wrap my feet around your slimy butt. Sitting like this my face is inches from yours, you are already a dripping mess, but I can’t help myself, I grab another custard pie and smosh it into your already gunged face. I’m having the time of my life!! And then……..

Your turn ! So what are you going to do huh??

*The boy wrote:*

As soon as that last pie hit me, you feel me my dick throb inside you.. I am obviously very close to comming. I can’t help but kiss you through all the splosh on our faces – tastes pretty good too! But, I am a little angry about the bowl of slop you through at me, It made my so slippery that you were easily able to slide onto my stiff, but gooey dick. And remember, my hands are free… I reach for a melting, sloppy-looking cream pie and swing it towards your face- but no! You block the attack and it slops onto the side of my face. Damn! You grab the rest of the missed pie and twist it in my face. By now, the bowl-gunge has dripped down my stomach and is collecting in a slimey pool over our privates. I try to pull out, but you keep forcing me back inside of you – this is creating a funny sound as the glop is spashes around our crotches. I’m going to cum if this continues. I reach for another pie, which I know you made ( it’s about 15 inches deep with whipped cream!) and a hit you hard with it square in the face – so hard that it knocks you off of me. I struggle to untie myself and roll on top of you, smearing my slimely body over yours – but not allowing you to put it in. You are a total mess, so I clear your face with my hands, and part of the sheet. All the pies are out of reach, so I slip myself inside you and pump you hard 7 times and pull out- just to tease you, then I roll off onto the floor and go for the other pies. You sit up and grab me from behind, but I slip through your fingers. You, much to my suprise roll off the other side of the bed and reach for something under the bed???

What next…

*The very messy girl wrote:*

We’re on opposite sides of the bed. You stumble and grab one of the pies I made especially for you, but stop before you can get up off of the ground when you see what I am doing.

I reach under the bed and pull out my nifty vaccuum cleaner that sucks…and does the opposite as well… it *blows*! =) I have been waiting for the chance to use this for ages! I filled it up before you came with litres and litres of extra thick whipping cream. Meanwhile, you’re looking at me as if I’ve lost my mind. I flick the “on” switch as you back away towards the corner.

There is a quick deep gurgling sound and I look down the hose for the source of the blockage. Bad move. I am hit in the face with a torrent of gooey cream and I hear you nearby laughing your head off at me. That’s it! I can barely see a thing but point the nozzle towards you and it hits you hard and splashes off you back onto me. The force is quite strong and it’s over real quick. But more importantly, you are absolutely dripping with gooey cream from head to toe! I grab the pie that you dropped when I hit you with the hose and push you down onto the ground and straddle your chest. Before you can argue, laughing, I smash the cream pie in your face and rub it in really well. Your face is absolutely layered with cream and crust and goo, it looks fabulous! I am dying to feel you inside of me so I can come. But, I think that you still need something first. I hop off of you and roll you over onto your stomach. I shove one of my special extra creamy pies in front of your face and you’re squirming to get away but it’s too late, I’m sitting on your back. I put both hands on the back of your head and push your face into the pie hard! It makes a lovely squelching sound as you make contact and I hear you going “mmmmnphhh!” in surprise through a pile of cold thick cream.

Sitting on your back, I notice how clean your hair is. I pick up a couple of cans of whipped cream and start to get it messed up properly. One hand is on the back of your head holding you face down in the pie still, and, with the other I start to spray cream onto your gorgeous black glossy hair. I smear it down the length of your hair which soon becomes heavy and gooey with the mess. Suddenly I drop the can (my hands are slippery after all) and get off of you to go get it.

You sit up and I smile when I see that the pie tin is still clinging to your face. I pick up two more pies and wait while you struggle pulling the tin off and wiping the gunge from your face. I hold the two thick cream pies topped with cherries and offer then too you. “C’mon. Pie me in the face and then fuck me hard, please? I know that you’re dying too.” You look at me and then….

*The very messy boy wrote:*

I slowly take the pies from you – expecting you to trick me, but you don’t. I postion a pie in front of your face, and one behind your head. You flinch with anticipation, but I wait… Then I smash both pies in on your head, twisting them into your face and hair until both tins meet on the top of your head. You look too cute to resist and I hug you-I slide it in, while we are standing up. I grab your butt cheeks to pull you closer, but you are so slippery. We fuck hard and roll around in this huge mess that used to be a bedroom.

Ending Variation 1

You finally feel me orgasm inside you, and this triggers yours as well. My dick stays hard long after I come, allowing you to have a mind-blowing 2nd and 3rd orgasm. We collapse onto each other with a nice squish. You look at me and say, “My neighbor will be home soon, we better go” I say, “Yeah, they should never leave their door unlocked…”

Ending Variation 2

I feel myself comming so I pull out and squirt it in your face – SPLOSH!! You yell at me for messing up your face We laugh, and then I put it back inside you and fuck you hard until I make you come – twice. By now I’m ready to come again, but we retire to the bathroom and shower off our mess while we continue having sex, standing of course. Afterwards, we walk back into the bedroom, and whatthefuck!!! The room is clean, not one pie, not one mess. Not one glop, not one sign that anything went on. Very strange…but very convenient. We look at each other and smile, then kiss each other. After all, this is our fantasy, anything can happen…

*****

We hope you have enjoyed this E-mail CYBER WAM battle! At least as much as we did. As I said before, there are more personal details in our messages that I have excluded – many are non-wam related. But, getting to know someone makes it much more fun to mess them up! More slime to come!

*The now-clean-boy…*

Abandoned Town

— by Anonymous —

One morning you wake up to find that your entire town has been evacuated and that you are the only person left. At first you are terrified and cannot imagine what has happened. But then you realize all of the empty shops and factories that are now vacant and filled with messy things. Excited, you put on a pair of jeans and a white t-shirt.

First you run to the supermarket. You run to the deli section where they sell pre-made fun and begin to pour it on top of you. First you dump the baked beans over your face. Next you throw yourself into the large container of macaroni and cheese. Soon you think the hell with it, you dive right into the deli case. Your body is immersed into wonderfully sticky and warm substances. You roll around in the mess. Coleslaw, pudding, tapioca, macaroni salad, baked beans, pasta, have now covered your entire body. It feels wonderful and you enjoy sliding around covered in the slop. Next you run to the isle where they have canned baking goods. First you open up ten giant cans of cherry filling and pour them on the floor. In front of that you pour vats of bisquick. You get a running start and dive face first into the slop. Your body becomes slick and you slide through. Soon you begin to scoop the mixture down the front of your pants. It feels wonderful and coats the entire inside of your legs.

Next, you cannot believe what you see in front of your eyes. The entire bakery section. In a case you see 100 cakes and pies. You run to them as fast as you can. begin to slam each pie into your face one at a time. First custard, then lemon, and then blueberry. Thick globs of filling drip down your chest. Then you begin to put the cakes down the front of your pants. After shoving down 10 pies, you collapse. Above your head you see a sign that says “Icing machine” You get up to see what it is. The machine is a large box with a conveyor belt leading into it. The machine is made to ice big sheet cakes. You lay down on the belt and push the start button. You start moving through and nothing happens. But then the machine stops and all off a sudden icing is sprayed onto you from every direction. Plastered, you crawl out of the machine. In the next room you see a huge mixer. Inside you see that it is filled with chocolate cake batter. You have an idea. You pull yourself into the giant mixing bin and hit the start button. Chocolate begins to flow all over you and you begin to move around. You grab the mixer and enjoy getting whipped around into this thick, black, oily mess. You crawl out now completely covered in the sludge. Your white shirt is no loger recognizable. Soiled, your heavy clothes cling to your body.

You then leave the grocery store and go accross the street to a car garage. You run into the garage and find tubes hanging from the ceiling. The first one says brake fluid. You hose yourself down with the mixture. It makes your body shiny and you feel wonderful. Next you see a hose labeled oil. You stick the hose down your pants and squeeze it. Soon, it begin to ooze out from your ankles. Then you pants fill up and the thick black sludge begins to flow down to front of your pants. Next you pretend to take a shower with the sludge. You hold the hose over your head and allow the cool sludge to flow down over your face and down your chest. You stand this way for several minutes until your body is covered.

You then try to think about where to go next. You then remember that a new candy factor had opened in you neighborhoos last year. You run quickly to the factory. Inside you enter a long hallway. You go into the first door that says, chocolate covered nuts. You pretend to be a nut (isn’t that hard to do 🙂 ) and dive onto the chocolate coating machine. You are passed under a waterfall of chocolate it slowly oozes on top of your entire body. It feels wonderful and for several minutes you sit under the shower letting the chocolate flow over you.

The next room is titled, “Filled Eggs” When you walk in you see many vats filled with marious substances. The first one is labeled butterscotch. You dive into the brown slop and it engulfs you. Suddenly you realize that it is draing from the bottom and you have to struggle not to get pulled under. You grab on tight and are able to pull, with all your strength, you plastered body out of the vat. Next you see a vat labeled, “strawberry cream” You do not want to dive in again and get sucked down, but you notice that there is a large lever to tip the entire kettle, for cleaning purposes. You position yourself in front of the vat and pull the lever. The vat slowly turns and suddenly you are ambushed with the gooey filling. It knocks you over and the strawberry filling flows over your body. When it stops you are plastered. You think, “Hey, I like my town a lot better this way”

A Foodiful Surprise

— by Anonymous —

John was a bit of a lonely bloke and hadn’t had a girlfriend for a number of months. One day he decided that he wanted a bit of fun and as his father was on holiday and his sister was staying at her boyfriends he thought it would be the perfect time to have a little fun. John went down to the shops and came back with 10 tins each of catering custard and beans. He then proceeded to tip the entire contents into the bath with custard at one end and beans in the other

The weather was terrible outside and he saw a number of people that he thought were wearing the right clothes to get drenched not like they were in rain but in food, but of course it was ridiculous to think that he could ask them to join him. When Jon had finally put all the contents into the bath he went into his sister’s room and looked around to see what he could put on. He decided on her purple jumper that was really warm and its neck came up to his neck and then was folded over to be quite thick. He then put on a pair of her leggings and then the main feature, her only pair of boots that had cost her 90 pounds. He knew he shouldn’t but he did.

He then walked into the bathroom, looked at the mess and just got in. The custard and beans come up to just below the knee-high boots and he started to put his hands into the mess and move it up his leg. He then sat down in the bath and was covered up to the neck of the jumper in the beans and custard. He sat there for about 5 minutes just messing about in it and then there was someone calling at the door. He suddenly realised that he hadn’t shut the door properly. The door to the apartment was a bit old and had to be pushed firmly for it to be shut completely otherwise it would just pop open with a gust of wind flowing through the corridor.

The voice was of Clare, a single girl that lived opposite and was a bit of a babe. They had often spoke but it never went further as she always had a boyfriend. Jon didn’t know what to do and thought that he couldn’t get out as the food would be dripped everywhere and he could lock the door as she would think that this was strange so he just laid there and waited. Clare eventually made her way up to the bathroom door and she opened it and looked in. All that Jon could do was smile and say hello. Clare was shocked and gobsmacked. She then came out with asking what he was doing so he thought he had better tell her the truth; she looked at him and asked if she could join in. It was then his turn to be shocked. She took of her socking wet puffa jacket and revealed a jumper not to dissimilar to the one of his sisters that he was wearing but it was black, much thicker and looked warmer. Clare also had on a leather skirt that was 3/4 length and then her pair of knee-high zipped boots that she always wore especially on nasty days and to the night-clubs.

Clare was soaked through as it was raining heavily outside. Jon asked if she was going to take of her clothes and Clare responded with the fact that he was wearing clothes in the food and that they were wet through anyway. Jon even asked about her boots and Clare said no as they added to the fun, Jon then revealed that he was also wearing legging and his sisters boots. She then lifted up on leg and just put it into the bath and then the other. Her boots were then fully in the bath and her skirt was just covered in custard and beans, she then proceeded to sit down in the bath slowly lowering herself until she was sitting down on the bottom. Jon asked her how she was felling and Clare said great but wished she was wearing trousers or legging like him as the custard and cream had gone up her skirt and covering her panties.

They sat together in the bath for about 5 minutes and the Clare started to explain how she always had a fascination to get wet and messy, she said that on a wet day you would always find her out somewhere getting soaked through. Jon thought that this was the perfect time to do something that he had always wanted to do, touch her boots. As she was sitting at the other end of the bath he could reach them as they were up by his hands. He started to rub his hands up and down the leather and then with one tug he pulled Clare towards him and her head went straight under the food and when she popped back up she was now totally covered. She was not to happy but then thought about getting him back. She stood up and took of her skirt. It was not doing anything but just getting in the way. She then knelt down in front of Jon and started to rub the custard all other his face and around his body. Jon then saw another opportunity and he scooped up a handful of the custard/beans mismatch and chucked it down her jumper, the Clare dunked him and they proceeded to muck around for about half an hour in the bath and then Clare said that she would really have to go and get clean as she had to work tonight.

Clare worked at a local shoe shop and had to work some late nights. They decided that she couldn’t walk out of the apartment covered in food so they both got out and walked in the shower and washed themselves of fully clothed. Clare then put back on her skirt and coat and although she was soaked, she really only looked a bit more wet than when she had came in. They then kissed and arranged to meet again after work that evening. Later David watched, as Clare stood outside waiting for a bus in a short skirt, long waterproof coat and those boots that had early been covered in custard and beans now being soaked in the rain that was still chucking it down.

In Your Dreams

— by AlanWam —

I love getting absolutely filthy as a prelude to sex and so when I have a girlfriend I always try to get her interested. Some are interested and others aren’t but I don’t think I’ve ever lost a girlfriend by asking, but with my latest girlfriend I think I’ve met my match. We’d been going out together for a few weeks when we ended up in bed together at my house. What better time to broach the subject and so I did.

She was very interested and asked all about slapstick so I showed her some magazines on the subject and she read them avidly. When she’d finished she started asking me questions. She asked me what turned me on in particular and I said the girl should be fully dressed in smart new clothes and she must get completely covered in lots of messy things with the ultimate aim of the clothes being totally ruined and preferably in rags. She asked what kind of messy things were the best and I said the messier the better and gave her a few examples. She read some more magazines and then we made love.

She caught me completely unawares in the morning as she was leaving when she invited me to stay at her house the following weekend. In a matter of fact voice she told me to bring lots of clothes as she planned to have a really messy weekend and with that she left. Well the next week went in a daze as I really wasn’t sure what she planned to do or if she was even serious but I decided I ought to be prepared so I set about packing a few changes of clothes and on Friday, with my heart pounding, I arrived at her house.

She opened the door and invited me in showing me into the lounge. The house was beautifully furnished and I decided I ought to ask what she did for a living as she was obviously well off, but before I could she asked if I was ready for some fun straight away and I said I was. I was glad I’d come prepared wearing jeans and a sweatshirt destined to be covered at some point. Although Rebecca looked gorgeous in anything I was a little disappointed to see she was wearing a pair of tight jeans and a t-shirt but I thought it was early days and got to my feet ready to do battle. Then, almost as an afterthought, she looked down at her clothes, said she better change and went off up the stairs.

I sat down again not really knowing what to expect. The clothes she’d been wearing were obviously new and expensive and I wondered if she planned to wear some really old clothes. I also began to wonder what food she had planned. It could just be a couple of eggs or, even worse, a shaving foam pie. So many thoughts went through my mind while I waited but when she reappeared my first worries were completely forgotten.

Rebecca is tall and very shapely with long legs that look good naked but look even better in high heels which is what she was wearing. To be specific, a pair of black suede court shoes with a four inch heel. Her long legs were encased in sheer black seamed nylons which disappeared, just above the knee, beneath the hem of a lovely black evening dress. It was black taffeta and had a low cut front, puff ball three-quarter length sleeves, a tight fitting embroidered bodice and a large full skirt which rustled with every step she took. Her long dark hair, which was cut in a fringe at the front, hung straight down her back and glistened beautifully. Round her neck, just above her ample cleavage, hung a fine gold chain which matched the long earrings and the dress watch. She gave me a twirl revealing a low cut back almost to her bum and as I let out a whistle she said she hoped I liked it as she’d spent a long time choosing the whole outfit yesterday and it had cost a lot of money.

Taking my hand she led me into the kitchen which was large and old. The floor was quarry tile and the units oak or something similar. What struck me first was there was no sign of Rebecca having bothered to put anything away or protect anything, I didn’t have long to think because my other worry was also dispelled when she pulled a sheet off a large array of buckets filled with all sorts of gunge. I didn’t have time to pay much attention to what was there because Rebecca picked up a bucket and walking to the other end of the kitchen she upturned it pouring a gallon of chocolate sauce on the floor. Then she walked through it deliberately dragging her feet in the chocolate before gesturing for me to do the same. I tipped a bucket of beans on the floor and did the same turning my white trainers orange. Rebecca took another bucket of beans and walked back to the chocolate end before turning and throwing the beans near me. They landed on the floor splashing beans up my jeans and all over the wall and units. I replied with another bucket of chocolate which, as it splashed up Rebeccas legs, brought a squeal of delight. Rebecca then sat me down and made me hold open the top of my jeans while she poured in a bucket of custard which flooded all down my legs. After I’d recovered I sat Rebecca on another chair and made a great play of getting her to hold up her dress out of the way which exposed her stocking tops and a lovely pair of white knickers. I soon changed that as I poured on a bucket of tomato ketchup. Rebecca moaned and just sat there until the sauce had finished running down her legs before standing and straightening her still clean dress. This was to change as I tipped a bucket of brown sauce into her cleavage and most of it went down the front. I couldn’t resist her lovely long hair so I took a bucket of custard and made her bend over while I carefully dipped all her hair in making sure it was completely covered before she stood up quickly spraying custard everywhere and I watched as it slowly ran down over her once immaculate make-up. Then it became a free for all until we were completely covered and the floor was awash with food. Her dress was quite strong and I only succeeded in ripping small bits off it before dragging it off her.

I stripped off my jeans and sweatshirt and Rebecca wasted no time in ripping my boxer shorts off. I ripped off her knickers in the same way but left the stockings until the last moments of passion and as we both approached a climax I ripped them to shreds. After a rest we got to our feet and Rebecca took me by the hand and led me through to a shower room at the back of the kitchen where we washed each other off. When we were dry Rebecca went off to dry her hair and I started on the kitchen. I found a large bucket and filled it with water before starting to wash down the units, the walls and the door which all came up surprisingly clean. Rebecca reappeared after about ten minutes and she had changed back into her jeans and t-shirt. As she walked past me she gave me a little feel before collecting a mop and starting to sweep all the food on the floor into one pile. I wondered what she was going to do with it but my question was soon answered when she produced some trash bags and, after dropping in the remnants of our clothes, she ladled the food in with a dustpan. What was fun to watch was the fact that she knelt down to do it and contrived to get a lot of food all over her jeans. Not only that but she continually wiped her hands on her t-shirt so when we had finished tidying up she was almost as messy as before. Taking my hand she led me back to the shower and pulled me in. After a good soaking she wriggled out of her jeans revealing the tiniest knickers I’ve ever seen. I wasted no time in removing these in my normal way before ripping the t-shirt off to get at those lovely breasts. This time we made love in the shower before going to lie down for an hour.

When we’d recovered I suggested we go out for something to eat and so we got dressed. I put on a smart pair of trousers and a shirt and Rebecca wore a short white jersey skirt, a white blouse tied up under her tits and a pair of high heeled white shoes. Before we went out I noticed Rebecca picked up all the clothes, including the jeans, from the shower and dropped them in a trahs bag. She directed me to a pub down by the river and we parked near the river bank some distance from the pub as it was very busy. Rebecca had to get out my side as we were alongside the grass and we had to negotiate some puddles in the car park as it had only just stopped raining. We had a nice pub meal and a couple of drinks and when we left my car was all on its own and as we crossed the car park I noticed Rebecca didn’t avoid the puddles but walked straight through them and when we got to the car she walked round to her side and asked for me to let her in. I went round to her side and found her standing ankle deep in mud churned up by cars turning. Noticing my gaze she looked down and laughed (as if she didnÎt know!) and said she ought to take off her shoes before she got in the car. I agreed and she promptly sat down in the mud and lifted both feet up to me inviting me to take them off. I looked down to see her skirt up round her waist and a pair of tiny white knickers half submerged in mud. I carefully pulled at her shoes and as they came off she contrived to fall backwards into the mud coating her hair. She then got to her knees and unzipped me, pulling out my erect prick. As I massaged the mud into her hair she gave me a lovely blow job right where I stood in the car park. When she’d finished she quickly stripped off all her clothes and wiped off most of the mud before throwing the clothes, including the shoes, in a waste bin and getting in the car. We went to bed that night absolutely knackered and we had a good lie in the next morning.

Rebecca was first out of bed and I noticed she was wearing a lovely white silk floor length nightie over which she slipped a matching negligee before going down to fix breakfast while I lay back down. I heard her come back in but didn’t pay any attention until she told me to sit up and gave me a cup which she filled from a large coffee pot. Then she gave me a plate with a couple of pieces of toast on and then produced a huge tub of margarine for me. I spread the toast and then asked if there was any marmalade. She said there wasn’t but she had some jam and produced a large catering tin of raspberry jam. She knelt on the bed and offered me the tin but as I went to dip the knife in she scolded me and told me not to use the knife. Before I could ask what I could use she dipped her hand in and lifted out a big scoop which she put on the side of my plate before carefully wiping her hand on the hem of her negligee. She then pulled back the bed clothes and sat astride my knees before grabbing two huge handfuls of margarine and starting to massage my body. She continued until I was coated from head to foot before she did the same with the jam. As she slid up and down me she got more and more margarine and jam over her clothes. Next she poured the now cooled coffee over me and lay down on me. The coffee acted as a lubricant and we slid up and down each other very nicely. Soon it was time for the negligee and the nightie to depart and they made a gorgeous sound as they ripped. We made love on the bed in all the mess before having another shower together.

After the shower we went to bed again but in the spare room and didn’t arise until lunchtime which went without a mess. Rebecca then told me she had something special planned for the afternoon but I had to be smartly dressed or else she wouldn’t do it. I went upstairs and came down in my best clothes but she said it wasn’t good enough and insisted I wear a suit. I said I would and drove home to change but Rebecca insisted on coming along. I showed her the suit I had in mind but she wouldn’t accept it and picked out one of my best along with a brand new shirt, silk boxer shorts and new shoes. I thought long and hard but eventually decided to sacrifice them all and hoped that it would be worth it. We drove back to her house and she got me dressed before packing me off to the pub for an hour.

When I got back I let myself in and waited in the lounge. Rebecca appeared some time later looking sensational. She was wearing an ivory silk, off the shoulder, wedding dress. It was heavily embroidered with a large floor length skirt and a long train. She lifted it up to show me the layers of net covering the white stockings along with a garter. The shoes were high heeled white satin and she wore some lovely jewellery topped off by a long white veil. She looked absolutely radiant as she led me out to the garage which had been completely cleared. I watched mesmerized as she kicked over a large drum of old engine oil which spread quickly over the floor. She then proceeded to walk round trailing her dress in it and I watched as it soaked up the material. She pulled up her dress and kicked over another drum before stamping in the oil splashing it up the front of her stockings and over her shoes.

Then it was my turn and Rebecca dipped a tin into another drum of oil soaking her sleeve in the process and threw the contents at me ruining my suit forever. I replied with a tin of my own directed at the front of her skirt. I watched as the material turned black and the oil soaked well in. Calling a halt for a moment I made Rebecca hold up her skirt and petticoats and I slipped her still white lace knickers down her legs a little way before filling them with a large pot of black grease. I then pulled them up tightly and watched as the grease oozed out from the sides. Rebecca then made me hold open the front of my trousers and shorts while she emptied in a whole gallon of red paint before letting me do them up again. I found it a little difficult to move after that as the paint didn’t run away very easily but it didn’t stop me from pouring a tin of blue paint down the cleavage of her dress. Then it was a free for all with paint and oil being thrown everywhere. The highlight for me was a gallon can of black paint which I used to flatten her veil and hairdo before it ran down her face covering her beautiful make-up. When all the materials were used up and we were both completely covered we set about each others clothes with a couple of pairs of scissors until everthing we were wearing was in tiny pieces. We were both exhausted as we tried to get as much off each other as possible before washing each other down in the shower armed with lots of cleaners which took some time and quite a few showers! We retired to bed completely knackered and only woke up briefly for an evening snack.

When I woke the next morning Rebecca was already up and I got dressed and went downstairs to find Rebecca in the kitchen dressed in a crisp white tennis outfit. She kissed me good morning and told me to sit down at the table which I did. I should have known what was coming but it was still a shock when a huge tub of warm porridge was tipped over my head completely engulfing me. A second and a third followed before Rebecca sat astride me and told me she wanted me to give her a seeing to with my tongue. With that she lay back on the table with her legs spread so I made sure I covered her with a lot of the porridge before I started to rub it well in. I moved slowly down the body, pulling up her t-shirt to expose her tits which she took over rubbing as I moved on down. When I reach my goal I tore a hole in her knickers allowing me to stick my tongue in and with the taste of the porridge mingling with her juices I licked her until she screamed, and then a little more.

The House Party

— by AlanWam —

(Noels House Party is a UK television programme where members of the public sometimes get gunged)

Sue and I went out for New Years Eve for the first time in years and it was definitely worth while.

A friend had suggested we go to a pub about ten miles from us called The Bull. He told me that it normally had fancy dress parties on New Years Eve and they were a lot of fun. Well we didn’t want to wear fancy dress but we put on some smart clothes, left the next door neighbour babysitting, and set off for the pub. We got there about nine and the car park was packed. Outside a sign said ‘Welcome to the Bull’s Public House Party!’. We went inside and, although it was busy, there was plenty of space and even some seats. The music was playing and lots of people were dancing so, while Sue found a seat, I got the drinks in.

No sooner had I sat down than the music stopped and a voice asked everyone to sit down. Gradually the people moved off the floor and revealed two large tables in front of a small stage. Sitting at one table were six fellas and at the other six girls. They were all wearing ‘Bull’ t-shirts and jeans and in between the tables was a fellow dressed in a gold suit and bow tie holding the microphone. What transpired was that they were holding a version of Noel’s House Party – hence the sign – and it was boys against girls in a series of games with all the proceeds going to charity.

They started with some simple questions and then moved on to silly party games like passing a balloon between the team members without using their hands. The fun started when one game required one member of each team to drink a pint of water without using his or her hands. They both did the same thing and used their teeth to hold the glass with the result that most of the water went down the front of their respective t-shirts. I noticed how easily the girls t-shirt turned transparent revealing a white lacy bra beneath.

Then the gunge tank made an appearance to a great cheer from the crowd and a particularly loud one from me. One person from each team was selected and the audience had to vote on which one was to be gunged by putting money in the hat in front of them. Needless to say I voted for the girl but when the money was added up it was the boy who was chosen. The tank looked like a shower cubicle, which it probably was, and as he sat down on the stool the MC climbed on a chair and tipped in a large bucket of gunge which looked like coloured wallpaper paste. After a moment there were cries for more and the MC agreed to put the girl in as well. This was what I wanted and she didn’t seem to be wasting any time in going in but the MC made a great thing about wiping the seat clean before she sat down. Then he asked for volunteers to pour in the gunge and my hand was up like a shot but he picked a girl from the audience.

She was a petite blonde wearing a little black sleeveless dress and heels which caused her trouble getting onto the chair. She could hardly lift the bucket but eventually the paste went in coating the girl completely. I loved the way it ran down her jeans as she stood up. As soon as she had gone the seat was wiped clean and then the girl was helped down but she wasn’t allowed to return to her seat. Instead the MC told her it was her turn and she laughed but he insisted and nervously she took a seat. He climbed up with another bucket and made a great play of shouting shall I? Much to everyones surprise, especially the girls, he actually did do it and there was a scream from her as the paste plastered her long blonde hair to her body. I wondered if it had been a set up but she actually came back to her boyfriend who was sitting near us and wasn’t sure whether to laugh or not but she seemed to be taking it in good spirit and told him she was going to wash some of it off.

The games continued for a little while longer and in the mean time the girl returned having washed most of the paste out of her hair and off her face but she still wore the sticky dress.

It was nearly half past eleven when the gunge tank was brough back into use and the MC announced that an auction was to take place and the four highest bidders would be able to pick someone to gunge. I realised that it would be groups of people who would win but I put a bid in anyway. After a quick count up the first bid was announced and I realised they were way above mine but it was all for a good cause. The first team picked a fellow from their own team and with much gentle arguement he removed his jacket before taking his seat and another member of his group tipped in the gunge to great drunken cheers.

After a now customary clean of the seat the next bid went to another large group and a second fellow was sent to his fate. This time his partner climbed up on the chair and emptied in the bucket. She didn’t escape entirely as he grabbed her and pulled her to him and gave her a great big kiss. She looked lovely with green paste down the front of her face, her blouse and her skirt. The next bid went to an all girl group and their elected victim was a very attractive young girl wearing a long tight black skirt, white blouse and black waistcoat. She got soaked by one of her friends and made sure everyone else got some by flicking it over her friends when she returned to the table.

The final bid went to a table near us and I wondered who they’d pick. I was surprised to see them looking round the room but I was even more surprised when they picked Sue. So was she but didn’t seem to mind too much as she made her way to the stage. She in fact got two bucketfuls, one red and one blue, before returning to the table.

As New Year struck all hell broke loose as somebody started throwing bucketfuls of gunge around the room and as we left there were very few clean customers. It turned out that my guess had been right as they’d used food colouring in paste and it didn’t come out. Sue’s rust coloured skirt, silky blouse and cardigan were permenantly stained not to mention her satin undies but we decided it was all good fun and we’d be going the next year.

The Gas Man Cometh

— by AlanWam —

Sally reached out her long arm over the edge of the bath and selected another bowl of beans from the small table at her side. Slowly she poured the contents over her already stained summer dress before letting the bowl slide lazily to her side to join the other empties. With her eyes closed she slowly massaged in the beans, enjoying the feeling as they mingled with the custard that was already there. Taking the last remaining bowl of custard she poured it ever so slowly over her short neatly groomed dark hair and, as it slowly ran down her face, her tongue briefly darted out to catch a small amount before her mouth became completely covered.

This was how Sally spent most Saturday mornings and it certainly beat traipsing round the shops. Sliding further down caused the weight of food in the bottom of the bath to push the short hem of her dress up revealing her small white knickers. Scooping up a handful of food from the bottom of the bath she slipped her hand into her knickers and started to rub herself ever so gently while the other hand slithered over her dress bringing small whimpering noises from her throat. The noise of her breathing was starting to rise when suddenly the phone rang causing Sally to freeze. After a moment the rhythmic movement of her hands continued but the phone persisted and eventually Sally, mouthing obscenities, wiped the custard from her eyes before heaving herself out of the bath and making her way to the landing to pick up the extension.

Snatching up the phone, and in an understandably gruff voice, she asked who was calling, all the while dripping food on the polished wood floor. It was the Gas Board telling her that they would be coming on Monday to service her fire.

“Well, I’m out at work all day!”, she lied, “You’ll have to come in the evening!”. She listened for a while before saying, “Right! After six then!” and slammed the now food covered handset down.

She stormed back into the bathroom, ignored the food filled bath, and stepped into the shower. As the warm water slowly rinsed off the food and soaked through her clothes Sally started to relax and eventually smiled as she thought about the poor woman who’d got all the abuse on the phone. If only she’d known what was going on at the other end.

In fact Monday was her day off and she had plans which didn’t include the Gas Board. She was off to have a facial and a hairdo before meeting a girl friend for lunch. Then it was off round the shops to find something for the following Saturday morning bath.

As she planned in her mind what to buy her hand found its way back into her soggy knickers and she finished off what had been so rudely interrupted by the phone.

Monday turned out to be an even better day than she’d planned. She had a long leisurely soak in the bath before getting dressed and driving into town. The facial and hairdo made Sally feel really good and the feeling was heightened as her make up was re-applied by a professional. She joined her friend for a long leisurely lunch and a chat which was extremely enjoyable and filled Sally with a feelgood feeling. Finally she went round the charity shops and found a dress for the following weekend. The final stop was at the Cash & Carry for some food before she eventually made her way home.

It was only just 5 when she got home but parked outside was a Gas Board van and as Sally parked her car in the drive the fitter got out.

He was young, very good looking, and dressed in smart blue overalls. He gave Sally a great big grin and said something to Sally who didn’t hear him at all as she was already getting a tingling between her legs just looking at him. He waved his hand in front of her eyes and she came back from her trance and invited him in, all thoughts of complaining about his early arrival having gone from her head.

She showed him the fire and he set to work immediately while Sally unloaded the car. She put everything on the kitchen table ready to find some space in the cupboards. She’d bought some large bottles of pouring syrup, which she’d never tried before, and she’d got a couple of trays of custard which would be enough for the next few weeks. The only other food she’d bought was a large strawberry and cream gateau which she planned to enjoy later that evening.

Suddenly the fitter popped his head round the door, “I’m finished now so I’ll be off.”

Not wanting him to go Sally thought quickly and then said, “Would you like a coffee?”

“Thanks very much, I’d love one. You’re my last job for today so I’ve got some time. I’ll just put my things in the van.”

Sally only had time to put the kettle on and put two mugs on the table before he returned. “Sit down” she said indicating the chair at the table. “Would you like milk and sugar?”

“No sugar, thanks.”

Sally took another look at him as she tried to think of something to say. He had removed his overalls and was now dressed in a pair of tight faded blue denims, a white t-shirt and a pair of white trainers. His tanned arms showed some signs of weight training but Sally found it hard to take her eyes off the good looking bulge in the front of his jeans.

The kettle clicking off brought her back to reality and she poured the water into the two mugs before adding some milk and giving it a stir. “My name is Sally”, she said offering her manicured hand.

He took her hand and, much to her surprise, he kissed it theatrically, “Mine’s Geoff, pleased to meet you Sally.”

“He’s gorgeous,” thought Sally, how was she to keep him?

“I can’t stop too long, I’ve got to get some food” said Geoff but his eyes were definitely looking Sally up and down, at least that what she hoped.

“Would you like some cake?” said Sally pointing to her newly bought gateau. “Anything to keep him here,” thought Sally.

“Just a small piece then”, said Geoff drinking some coffee, “then I must be off.”

As Sally cut a slice she had a deliciously wicked thought about how to keep him from going. She put the slice on a plate and carried it over to him. Then, with a great piece of acting, she tripped and contrived to let the gateau slip into Geoff’s lap. It couldn’t have landed in a better place as, when she looked, the was a large lump of cream and strawberry sauce right on top of the bulge in his jeans.

“Oh, I’m terribly sorry” blustered Sally, secretly proud of her brilliant ploy. To her surprise Geoff didn’t move but only smiled and said, “You better wipe it off then!”

Taking a cloth Sally started to rub the cream making sure it got well rubbed in and to her delight she felt a stirring beneath her hand.

“When you’ve finished rubbing all that cream in I think it must be my turn.” Sally couldn’t believe what she’d heard but she wasn’t going to say no. She gave some thought to her new hairdo, her cream silk blouse, her long black chiffon skirt and underskirt, her silk camisole and knickers, her sheer black stockings and her matching black suede shoes. She thought how expensive they all were and she thought that their sacrifice couldn’t be more worthy. “I don’t know what you mean?” she replied coyly hoping she knew exactly what he meant! “Oh I think you do!” he said and pushed her back until she was almost lying on the table. With one hand he lifted up her skirt and underskirt exposing her tiny knickers while, with the other, he scooped up a handful of cream and strawberries from the gateau and slapped them onto the front of her crutch. Sally gasped but said nothing. Her heart was beating at twice its normal pace and her throat was dry, unlike her pussy!

“And some topping” said Geoff before ripping open a carton of custard and squirting it between her legs.

Sally lay back and luxuriated in the feeling as the custard ran round to her bottom. After a few moments she sat up and slid off the table feeling the custard run down the inside of her thighs and drip onto her shoes. “Now it’s my turn” and she picked up a custard carton which Geoff was only too willing to tear open. She poured it inside his t-shirt and watched as it formed a yellow belt around his waist, stopped by the tight waistband of his jeans. When the carton was empty she pulled out the waistband and he squirmed as the custard flowed through his jeans.

“Hands behind your back” commanded Geoff and Sally obeyed meekly. He unscrewed the top of a bottle of syrup and poured it slowly over the front of her blouse moving the bottle from side to side making sure she was well covered. They both watched as the syrup moulded her clothes to her body and the outline of her breasts and hardened nipples appeared.

When the syrup had finished dripping Sally undid the button of Geoff’s jeans and slid the zip down before taking another bottle of syrup and, as Geoff obediently held out his white boxer shorts, Sally poured the whole bottle in over a rather large erect prick. She had to stop occasionally as the syrup was slow to run down the legs of his tight jeans but eventually it was all gone and Sally couldn’t resist giving his glistening manhood a little lick before zipping him up again.

Another carton of custard was opened and this Sally directed over Geoff’s hair rubbing it well in like a shampoo before doing the same with a bottle of syrup. As his t-shirt became soaked in syrup she could resist putting her long nails into the thin material and ripping it open revealing his sun tanned chest. He just grinned at this treatment so Sally reached over for the kitchen scissors and removed his jeans by carefully cutting them off his body. He looked even more gorgeous standing there clad only in his bulging boxer shorts. She watched as custard and syrup dripped from his head and formed little rivers down his dark skin and over his shorts.

She didn’t resist as he pushed her back onto the table top before turning her onto her front. Two or three bottles of syrup flowed over her back until both her blouse and skirt were moulded to her like a second skin. Then she felt custard flow over her head and she looked through a wall of it as it ran off the fringe of her once immaculate hair.

He rolled her over onto her back and peeled her sticky skirt off the table before grasping the flimsy material in both hands and slowly ripping the skirt to the waistband. He repeated the move over and over again, until the skirt was in ribbons, and as he did so the sound of the material tearing made Sally feel as if she was on a permanent orgasm. The underskirt went exactly the same way before he slowly pulled the buttons off her blouse one at a time making sure he took a little material with each one.

“He’s not doing this on his own” though Sally and easily ripped her camisole open down the front revealing her ample charms. He coated these in custard which Sally rubbed in with glee while Geoff removed her knickers with one swift tug and coated her pussy in a handful of gateau.

He slid down between her legs and started to lick off the cream and within seconds Sally screamed in delight before collapsing exhausted on the table top. She lay there completely drained for some time and she assumed that she must of fallen asleep because when she finally did struggle to her feet there was no sign of Geoff. She removed the remains of her clothes before going to shower and she saw that Geoff had obviously been there before her.

When she finished her shower she went and lay down and was asleep within minutes. She dreamt of her wonderful evening and whether she’d ever see him again. One thing she was sure of was that she’d be having her fire serviced regularly from now on!

After Dinner Dessert

— by AlanWam —

I’ve just had my first introduction to slapstick and I loved it although it had some interesting moments.

Sex is not that easy as I share a house with a girl friend of mine and my current boyfriend shares with four other guys. When my girl friend told me she was going away for the weekend I told Graham and he suggested we went out for a meal on Saturday night and I agreed, adding that coffee could be taken at my house!

The meal was a great success and we went back to the house and opened a bottle of wine as it was still early. As we got more comfortable the subject turned to sex and Graham said he wanted to show me something very different if I was agreeable. I was a little unsure as he could be planning to do anything but, seeing my hesitation, he told me that he wasn’t going to harm me or anything like that and so I eventually agreed. He wasted no time from then on and took me to the bedroom and told me to strip off which I was only to happy to do but then he told me he wanted me to get dressed again and he would pick the clothes. Mystified I agreed and showed him where everything was kept. After some searching he selected an oldish white bra and knickers and of course a suspender belt and stockings as I knew he would. From the wardrobe he took out a white button through blouse and a full floral cotton skirt I hadn’t worn for years and then he told me to get dressed and join him downstairs. I started to get dressed in a daze and then decided I would put on some other clothes in which I felt sexier but were still similar to his choice. I had a nice matching undies set in white lace and I particularly liked the bra as it made my already large firm breasts even more prominent and gave me a lovely cleavage. I picked another button through white blouse but this one was beautifully embroidered and much newer. The skirt I swapped for a lovely full black ankle length number and I added some smart black court shoes to complete the ensemble.

While I’d been getting dressed I’d heard the front door open and shut a few times and when I went into the kitchen I found Graham sitting at the table which was now covered by a cloth under which were some unknown items. I also noticed that Graham had changed and now wore a pair of black trousers and a white shirt in place of his suit and there were no shoes on his feet. I found this very curious and asked him what he was up to but he wouldn’t tell me. He commented on my change of clothes and said I looked great but then he added something that I didn’t yet understand as he said he hoped I wouldn’t regret my decision later on.

He didn’t let me dwell on that but sat me down on a kitchen chair and sat astride me before unbuttoning my blouse until my bra was just visible. Then he kissed me a few time on my neck before producing a small spoon and a pot of yoghurt from under the cloth. He dipped in the spoon and took it out brimming with yoghurt and I thought he was going to feed me but instead he dribbled some onto my neck. It was icy cold and it ran slowly down my neck towards my tits before Graham slowly licked it off. It was a lovely sensation as his tongue ran up my neck and I giggled. He repeated the move again before getting off me and lifting my skirt to my waist and instructing me to hold it in place. He then produced a jar of jam which he opened and pulled out a handful which he rubbed on my thighs between my stocking tops and knickers. Again he licked it off very slowly and I loved the feeling of his tongue brushing my knickers. When my thighs were clean he straightened my skirt and sat astride me again. This time he produced a jug and tipped it towards my chest. I assumed this was to be a repeat of the yoghurt but this time he poured on custard which was deliciously warm and we both watched as it ran down over my tits. I was a little alarmed as he let it run on without attempting to stop it and before long it reached my bra. I wasn’t sure I approved of this but I forgot my doubts as once again his tongue started its cleaning job.

Again he lifted my skirt and this time he squirted a line of chocolate sauce up my stockings from the knee to the top seam before licking it off. My concern over the mess soon passed yet again as his tongue did its job. When he’d finished he asked me which I’d liked best and I said that the last one had been the best but maybe his tongue ought to travel a bit further. What I meant was upwards but that’s not what happened exactly as he picked up the custard jug and poured the entire contents over my leg. I watched in horror as it covered my stockings, my shoes and flooded across the floor. I still enjoyed the next bit as Graham started with his tongue at my shoe and ran it quickly up the leg stopping just short of goal. There was so much custard he had no chance of licking it off and he emerged with his face covered and it. He wiped his face clean before pulling my skirt down over my legs and sitting astride me. I was about to comment on the custard soaking through my skirt when he produced his next surprise and tipped a large bowl of baked beans over my blouse. I gasped, not only from the cold beans, but also from the mess he’d made of my blouse. I could feel the beans running down the inside of my blouse as he rubbed them well into my tits staining not only my blouse but my once white bra.

Next he removed my still clean shoe and I watched in horror as he filled it to the brim with tomato ketchup before squashing my foot back in. He then emptied some tapioca or semolina over my skirt before sitting on me and squashing it in with his bum. The final indignity came as he emptied a tin of syrup over my head rubbing it well in ruining my hairdo and make-up.

Even though I must have looked a mess and I smelt I was starting to get turned on by the food running down inside and outside my clothes, but now it was my turn.

I sat Graham down on the chair and pulled the cover off the table revealing all sorts of messy food. I then set about making sure his clothes suffered in the same way mine had. I then pulled up my skirt revealing my knickers, which were still surprisingly white, and tipped in a pot of chocolate sauce followed by a pot of cream which contrasted nicely. Although a lot ran out down my legs I ordered Graham to lick the rest off. He obediently set to work with his tongue and I was lost.

Eventually my legs could hold out no longer and I sank to the floor lying in all the food. Graham dropped his trousers and shorts and we had a lovely sloppy fuck together.

The surprises weren’t over because just as we’d finished we heard the front door open. There was nothing we could do so we just lay there and in walked Tina, my flatmate. She certainly looked shocked but she didn’t say a word and went into the lounge and turned on the television. Graham and I had to laugh as we set about clearing up the kitchen and ourselves. As I removed my clothes I realised none of them were worth salvaging and I thought of the cost but I decided that the results were worth it and vowed to repeat the experience again.